Tuesday, February 11, 2014

I literally have no idea what to put as the title of this blog post. 

This whole blogging world is still really something I have a love/hate relationship with. The more I dive into it, the more I feel like it's just another social media outlet to make our lives look so sparkly and shiny. To make us look like we have it all together. It's a place to post pictures of our perfect children, our perfect husbands, our perfect houses.
 I don't want my blog to be that. 
I know that the entire blogging world does not consist of this, but the blogs I follow mostly make me feel like my two bedroom apartment is inadequate. They make my heart long for a beautiful house with subway tile back splashes, barn wood accents, and a beautiful kitchen that I can cook up delicious meals like risotto and beef bourguignon (and yes I did have to google how to spell that!) 

The inadequacy and low self esteem truly eats at my soul sometimes. As much as my heart is longing for the house of my dreams, a precious baby in my arms, and the time and energy to DIY every aspect of my existence, I realize this is not a goal I can achieve, and while my heart longs and my mind thinks on these things all the live long day, I need to learn to be satisfied. I need to learn to soak in every once of sunshine God gives me. I need to remember what reality is. I need to give thanks to God for all He has blessed me with in the small moments and in the dark, dreary, cob webbed infested thoughts of my mind. 

Mostly, I just miss an outlet to write my thoughts. I miss a place to put my feelings. So, I'm back in the saddle. The key strokes at my finger tips long to write out what I feel and what I have on my mind... so here it goes again. No plans, no hopes, no striving to be something I'm not. Just words on a (web)page and feelings written out into the world. I hope that in writing things and sharing my heart here that others are blessed. I plan to post even the gross, the ugly, the downright bitter ends of my life here and not jut the sparkly, ravishing, elaborately glamorous (like my life is at all glamorous, let's be real here people) portraits. 

Welcome back Lace in the Kitchen. 

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